look at this fucking real-life horror movie

Photograph courtesy Audrey Dussutour
Neither slime nor mold, these single-celled organisms use a kind of external physical memory when navigating, much like a trail of breadcrumbs. Read about some creepy experiments.

look at this fucking black devil

Photograph courtesy Edith Widder, ORCA
A female angler fish known as the Humpback Black Devil sports a glowing lure. See more bioluminescence in the abyssal Caribbean.

look at this fucking unique turtle

Photograph from FLPA/Alamy
The Chinese soft-shelled turtle pees out of its mouth. I don't want to know how this will help people with kidney failure.

look at this fucking demon

Photograph courtesy NIWA
Female black dragonfish—such as this newfound specimen of the Idiacanthus genus—are "fierce predators" of small fish. But "interestingly, male dragonfish lack teeth and a functional gut, and are thought to live only long enough to breed," biologist Malcolm Clark said.

look at this fucking unsettling toad birth

look at this fucking goblin shark

look at this fucking oxymoron

Your move, Jumbo Shrimp.
Photograph courtesy Oceanlab, University of Aberdeen
Source

look at these fucking suckling cubs

Courtesy of Aaron Buckley

look at this fucking insatiable bullfrog

look at this fucking scuba spider

This is one of few spiders species where the male is larger than the female. Also they spend their entire lives underwater. Cue horror.

Look at this fucking magician

Photograph courtesy Roger Hanlon, Marine Biological Laboratory
See more photos of Cuttlefish

look at this fucking symbiotic shitter

This bat sleeps in pitcher plants for protection, and the plant benefits from the nutrients in the bat's guano. Truly a horrifying relationship.
Photograph courtesy Holger Bohn

look at this fucking crafty cephalopod

look at this fucking bat wang

Courtesy of SKilroy.

look at this fucking big-ballin cricket

Photograph courtesy Richard Richards, University of Derby for National Geographic
This cricket's testicles account for 14% of its body mass. For an average human male this would equate to a 22-pound sack.

look at this fucking dark sider

Photograph courtesy Kevin Raskoff, Monterey Peninsula College
Darth Vader would be proud, right before he destroyed the entire planet with the Death Star.

look at this fucking transparent hermaphrodite

This 3cm carnivorous nudibranch - or 'sea slug' if you want to be a
dick about it - is laying quite an attractive mass of eggs.
Unsurprisingly-fitting marine biologist quote of the day:
"That was a treat." -Jeff Goddard, UCSB
Photo credit: Jeff Goddard

look at this fucking bike race

I think the humans are losing.

The Christmas Island Crab migration sounds like a horrifying
experience your first time, but I guess every first experience with
crabs would be horrible.

Photograph from Photolibrary

look at this fucking nut cracker

The Pacu fish - related to Piranhas - sports creepy human-like teeth
that it uses to crack open fruits and nuts.
When swimming in Brasil, make sure you protect your delicate nuts and fruits.

Photo © Julia Dorn/courtesy National Geographic Channel

Look at this fucking eight-legged freak

Courtesy of Matt Benchimol.